Breaking Free

So I've started doing the Beth Moore Breaking Free bible study. I'll be honest I started it reluctantly. It sounds silly to say that I would not desire freedom from captivity but to be perfectly honest this past year I've gotten so used to running into walls and bouncing around my cell that the thought of having ample space to run is kind of scary. This past week we looked at the 5 benefits that come from freedom.

1. To know God and believee Him

2. To glorify God

3. To find satisfaction from God

4. To find peace

5. To enjoy God's presence.

Out of all of them I thought that to find satisfaction from God would be the one that hit me the hardest. I was surprised how my heart broke when I realized for such a long time I haven't enjoyed being in God's presence. It was out of obligation, or it felt like work and I had ALMOST gotten content and used to letting it be just that. Oh how fresh those words were to hear that I have missed out on really just enjoying our time together.

I really have LOVED sitting and just BEING with the Lord. We have had some of the most amazing dates a girl could ever ask for. We have sat for hours together, not talking, just sitting and being. So delightful. We've laughed so hard together at our inside jokes, my short comings, my constant whining, and just my good sense of humor (which He likes to boast that He gave me). So fun! How in the world did I let that slip through my hands? Like dating it isn't about the butterflies, although He def has given me those. It is about the sense of peace and feeling completely loved, accepted, appreciated, and enjoyed back!!!

I always ask Megan, do her and John laugh like this all the time? Or if it is weird in the car when no one is talking (I like to fill dead air)? I can't imagine those married couples who go out to dinner and just sit there and stare at each other, yet I have totally done it with the Lord and LOVED our date! Interesting.

Needless to say I'm excited to begin our enjoyable courtship. We've seen our share of rough times together but the good thing is He is always constant and I am always in need of His love and consistency. Lucky for me He isn't walking away.

Here's to us just enjoying being around each other!!! (And of course He enjoys me... He made me- I'm great!)