The Leaves are Falling

After a long break from my blog I am attempting to write again.  The last post was a bit of a downer but truthful.  I settled into a season of processing my new life here in New York and took some time to write without posting.  Life is not perfect and I never want to give that impression on my blog but there are times where writing without posting is a necessity. 

Quick summer review:  Summer came and went.  Fast.  The days were long but the weeks were really short and I survived my first summer as a property staff wife.  I spent most of my days by the pool and hanging out with interns and of course being at camp each night.  We had some amazing assignment teams and the Lord was gracious to me for those friends.  The summer had some really hard parts.  My mom-maw lost her battle with breast cancer in June and I flew home to spend some much needed time with my family and Brian and I had to figure out a system for handling late nights and long days here during camping season. All in all it was a great summer but it felt good to close the summer out and mark off my first summer camping season.  

Fall settles in pretty quick around here and I have learned that summer is probably the shortest season in New York.  If the leaves on my deck are any indication we will not be in fall much longer either.  I kid you not I think I sweep it once a day.   September was fun for many reasons and our neighbor's and friend's wedding was most certainly one of them.  We headed to Richmond on the 21st to celebrate these two.  It was a honor to be a part of the festivities.  Brian was a groomsmen and I served as the grandparents during the rehearsal, haha.  Mostly I was just Brian's side kick! We loved celebrating them and we are very excited to have them here at camp with us.

Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Chocklett

We were also lucky enough that on the front end of our trip to Richmond we got to spend a week in West Virginia.  My heart was so happy!   It was our longest trip back since we got married and it came at a perfect time.  After the summer I definitely needed a little recharging and nothing does it quite like some time with my people!   BA stayed an extra day so that I could see her before she went back to school from the weekend. I was so thankful for that afternoon with her.  It was hard because I was keeping a secret from her but she made it out of town before I spilled the beans!  Shew!   It felt like normal life again shopping with Shelly, sitting and talking with Steph, working out twice with Stacy, and visiting my grandmother & grand-dad with my sister and the boys.  It was so good to be with family! I'm really excited because this year I'll get to go home a lot to celebrate babies and couples!   I just love the ease of these people and life together with them!   After our time away Brian and I settled back into fall here in NY and the nice lull of the fall season in camping.  Our weekends are full of work but our weekdays are finally on a normal 8-5 schedule.  It is refreshing.  We got to join a small group at our church and we are excited to get to know some people from the community (sort of) next to ours.  We are looking forward to our church plant that will shave 30 minutes off of our travel time and for the things the Lord is going to do through that.  

Life After the Move

Seven months ago I got married. Seven months ago  I also moved to a completely new place.  Isn't it funny sometimes some of the happiest moments of our lives are completely enmeshed with some of the scariest and uncomfortable moments?  Over the past few days I have been reflecting on moving.  You can always see things more clearly after you've gone through it and look back.  

*Disclaimer:  I have not "arrived" yet.  I still miss Charleston desperately at times. I constantly miss my friends and family. Still cry non stop on occasion.  I have pangs of sadness.  And my desire to constantly visit is never really satisfied.*

There are some things with a move you're prepared for.  The general everything will be different is an understatement.  HA.  You plan for things to be different.  Your friends & families are now hundreds of miles away.  You have to be really organized and get packed and actually moved.  And the general everything will be different statement is always looming in your head.  It isn't until you've arrived at said new location that you really begin to realize what the word everything means. 

One of my biggest meltdowns came after rushing around and taking off work to get my new license.  The debit card machine went down literally as I stepped up to the window to pay.  We had prepared every possible piece of paperwork ahead of time so that it would be smooth sailing and that I would get in and out and back to work without more time off.  As I asked the lady to try again, tears in my eyes, I told her I understood that I'd have to come back (its an hour way from where I work) and that it was okay.  I cried the whole way to my car. Why?  Because she had said just run to the ATM and grab some cash and be back.  It was the perfect plan! And I loved the brilliant idea.  Except.  I didn't know where an ATM was, I didn't even know where I was.  I used my GPS in the car and I quickly turned from sad to angry when I learned my new bank didn't actually have a bank or ATM anywhere near this place.  In a moment of anger I ripped the GPS off the dashboard and threw it across my car as hard as I could!  SHEW! I felt better.  Then I frantically looked to see if I broke a window or the GPS.  Thankfully I did not and hysterical laughter ensued.   That's moving for you!

Nobody ever tells you that the everything means that you will suddenly be directionally challenged.  Sure they may say everything will be an adventure. But what they won't say is you'll get lost.  You'll use a lot of gas trying to find a grocery store.  Or that sometimes just sometimes you'll need to prepare for every possible payment option in case suddenly the DMV's machine goes down!

Learning to Compromise

Greetings from SUNNY & WARM New York!  I could not be more thrilled!  My heart could not be more excited... I'm having trouble sitting still for long.  One of the perks of my office is that the windows open!  Praise the Lord for this small blessing.  I know that when you work on the 57th floor that isn't possible but today I am thankful for ground floors and open windows!


There is one common word when talking about the key to marriage (or the key to every good relationship/friendship) "compromise".    I think it is mostly because it is the hardest thing we really have to do.  Meeting someone in the middle is WAY harder than persuading them to come to your side but if you want to show someone how much you love them and how much they mean to you... you're gonna have to make some concessions. 

Summer is quickly approaching and for us as a family that means a lot of long days.  Brian's job will be all encompassing and while I'm nervous for what this looks like for us I'm also excited because I know this is truly what he is called to and his heart hungers for it.  So we will develop a plan that will most likely get thrown out week 2 or possible even negative week 1.  We will adapt, we are hoping we do it graciously.  ha.

In preparation of summer we decided we needed some us time.  So we decided at the beginning of last week that we would sneak away for the weekend.  Well we had been talking about it for months really BUT couldn't decide on where to go or what to do.  I wanted to veg and explore and Brian wanted some thrills.  Finally, we compromised.  I picked Cape May and he picked Six Flags.  Away we went.

Saturday was perfect, we left bright and early Saturday morning and four hours later my toes were in the chilly sand of the Northeast Coast. We walked the promenade, walked on the beach, dipped (quickly) my toes in the water, ate custard, and went store to store.  Brian was a champ! 

 

 

 

 

 

On the windy (and a bit cold) beach of Cape May.

Sunday morning we woke up and made the two hour trek to Six Flags.  Brian was more excited than a 3rd grader.  We arrived at the park as soon as it opened and realized Sunday at the park was going to be perfect weather (60's and sunny) and the crowds would not be around!   You couldn't have asked for more perfect weather or conditions.  We waited maybe 20 minutes at the most for rides.  Simply perfect.  We hit every coaster I think at least twice and one we rode THREE times! 

3rd coaster of the day.  This is a picture of one happy man! 

Let's talk about King da Ka.  It is the fallest, tallest coaster in North America.  As soon as we got to the park I started asking for permission to bail on this coaster.  Brian however would NOT grant permission.  After watching it run a few times I thought it was manageable, as long as I held my breath and closed my eyes, I could do anything for 60 seconds.  And that is exactly what I did for three rides, held my breath and closed my eyes.  It goes so fast that you really can't keep your eyes open anyways.  On the first run I opened my eyes as soon as we started over the hill to plummet 456 feet downwards and immediately closed them after the .5 seconds they were open.  Nope! 

This is a weird tiny picture. I don't know what happened.  That's right folks 456 feet up and down!

I get compromise.  We both had a perfect weekend.  We both got to enjoy what really refreshes us and we both got to enjoy each other.  I know why parents leave their kids and get away.  We don't even have kids but I'm looking forward to leaving them and spending some time just the two of us!  Two days felt like five (in a good way).  Compromise I'm learning to like you  more and more.

Trust Issues

Here lately I have discovered that I have some major trust issues.  It isn't with Brian.  It isn't with people who I am getting close to here in the community.  It isn't with family.  It is with the weatherman.  I have tracked it back to  Phil.  Punxsutawney Phil that is.  It all started with him.  He came out of his little hole and predicted that spring was right around the corner. 

My heart leapt! My bones aches!  My toes screamed with excitement for flip flop weather.  Then each day passed and my heart hardened and I knew.....

He.  Had.  LIED!

The damage has been done and  I am not sure how I will get past it but today offers a real glimmer of hope.  The snow is gone.  Did you hear me?  THE SNOW IS GONE.  People listen this is monumental!  The forecast is calling for a high of 52!  The sun is out and I think the best part is that the remainder of the near future is calling for 50s!

My heart is becoming less heavy.  My shoes are containing less and less material and my scarves are being worn less frequently.  (I'm not even sad about the last one which is how you know I mean business!)

Today.  Thursday.  Offers a glimpse and a hope of what is to come.  Things are being made new here people.  Things are being made new!

Tell Your Truth Tuesday

If you haven't checked out tell your truth tuesday you're missing out. 


Today I will tell my truth ...

On really hard days.... my sister makes me laugh.  There are times, especially lately, that are just really hard.  There are a handful of people who listen to my whining, who let me vent, who allow me tears, and who consistently love me during and after the hard parts.  I am very blessed. Megan is one for those people and she lets me do all of those things quite often. She also on the hardest of days makes me laugh wholeheartedly.  Laughter is like an ocean flooding the achy dry parts.  Refreshing, soothing, and healing.



Thanks for making me laugh today Megan!

Six Months and Counting

I wish had some statistics for you.  It would be fun to say I burned 4 dinners, ruined 16 batches of cookies, or cried 1,400 times in the first six months.  Truth is we've just lived life for 6 months and the stats went unaccounted for.  Although we all know I probably cried more than 1,400 times. 

Last weekend, 6 months and 2 days, into our marriage we traveled to WV (home) to see friends get hitched.  In the car Brian and I played a little game called "Things We've Learned in the First 6 Months of Marriage".  While I won't share our answers some of them were HILARIOUS.  You guys are really missing out my man is FUNNY!   There was only one rule for the game

Rule 1 and Only:
What have you learned about the OTHER person in the first 6 months of marriage? 

Simple right?  It was fun.  Some things were funny.  Some things were funny but stemmed from some what tense moments.  Some were just practical.  6 months isn't a long time to be "doing life" with someone but there does seem to be a lot of lessons learned right out the gate.  At least there were for us.  While I won't share Brian's answers about me I will share some insight into some things I've learned about myself.

1.  I shouldn't move often.  I like settled even though I pretend that I don't.  I do.

2.  I cry a lot.  I knew this ahead of time but recently I've learned I cry a lot more than I thought I did.  Which was a lot originally.

3.  My heart is for community.  Oh I love my husband but there is nothing like a good group of women living life together.  NOTHING.

4.  Weather plays a role.  9 months of winter is about 6 more than I'm used to.  I need sunlight and I need it badly.  (Before next winter I will be investing in a light therapy lamp!)

5.  I've got stuff to work on.  I tend to think I'm great.  I generally roll with the punches... (please note the word GENERALLY - meaning not all the time) but stick me in a house with someone else and well let's just say marriage has a way of rubbing off the rough edges. 

Our first six months are in the bag and while they were full of ups and downs, laughter and tears, talking and silence Brian and I concluded after our car game that we wouldn't change anything.  Those experiences have buffed us up and made us a little more tolerable to not only each other but to others around us.  My sister was convinced our first year of marriage would be hilarious and so far it has proved not to disappoint.  I'll leave you with Brian's insightful take away one day as we drove home from church and I song I wish I had written but Kid President beat me to it.

"I used to think women were normal people..... and then I married one!"   - Brian

(Said in the most matter of fact non emotional tone)

Lessons Learned by the Snow

After a mean joke played by Mother Nature, 43 and sunny, the snow came.

Here is the thing about snow it looks beautiful.  Winter is so dingy.  Then the snow settles on the dark crusty ground and pale sad trees and instantly the world looks like a brighter place.  And if I could stay inside and look at it I would love it.  It causes us to want to hibernate like bears, snuggled up in warm homes by fires, drinking coffee, eating pancakes, and watching movies.  However when hibernation isn't an option I become like the bear who has to go out in mid winter looking for food.  Determined and usually disappointed.  Brian is working really late tonight so this morning when I got up and saw the snow I figured I'd give him the morning off.  I swept the stairs, shoveled the walk, dusted off the cars and warmed mine up.  All the while thinking look at me aren't I great? I am so capable!   I heard camp's plow outside so I figured things were probably less snowy off the mountain and that I'd just go to work as normal.  

I jumped in the car and off I went. 

I confess on our driveway I was going very slow and taking pictures.  I then exited the driveway a bit startled by the condition of the main road but also overly confident in my ability and maybe a bit stubborn.  What fun is a snow day if you've gotten up at 6am showered and are fully ready to tackle the day?   I climbed the first hill.  Brian's car has a traction light on it that flashes when you're wheels are sliding and it enables traction control.  Really all it does for me is flashes you're probably going to die today.  I start sliding.  

I push on.

I peak the mountain and what do I see?  Hardly anything the snow is coming down hard, the snow on the roads is piling up.  I pull slide sideways into the fire station and wait.  In this moment I think I could keep going or I could go back.  I decide going back isn't an option because that hill is kind of brutal going up so going down can't be fun.  

So I push on. 

About 200 feet was a small hill, barely even a down grade, however when I start down I start sliding.  Less confident than before I pull off in a parking lot and decide I'm not sure I'm up for the bigger hill I have to go down in another 200 feet.  What to do?  What to do?  

I back track.

Back in the fire station's lot I wait.  I waited for a plow truck. That was my plan.  If a plow truck comes by I can follow him either to the valley or back home.  After 2 minutes I convinced myself I was cold and hungry.  While talking to my sister I confessed it then quickly followed it up with a sane thought... I think I'll survive.  I hoped that I would.  After ten minutes I heard the rumbling of the truck.  I was saved!  I put down my kindle and got ready to follow it to safety.  Except the truck didn't put his plow down. NEW RULE: If you have a plow on your truck and there is snow on the road just drive with it down... even if it isn't your section to clear! After about another ten minutes a truck with its plow came through heading back towards my house.  I started the car and off I went at a fast 5-10 mile an hour pace.  I made it home and decided that I'd camp out for a bit and try again in a little while.

I learned two things  today.

1.  I may think I can do anything but sometimes I can't.

2.  At least I'm willing to try.